|
|
Post by usawoman on Aug 13, 2019 16:25:25 GMT -5
Hi all,
It has been a long time since I posted here. I wonder if one should be nice to someone simply because they have mental or emotional issues? Is that just as awful as being mean to them due to that? Someone who I know has problems told people not to tell me for fear that I would tell my older sister, whom is is still obsessed with, after all of these many years. He thinks that since sis was nice to him back in the day I should be must be nice and his friend also. I can say that my sister wasn't into him or wanted to be his best friend. She was only 'polite' to him in public. Earlier this year this man comes up to me at Walmart and I move to the other side of Dad. Dave hangs his head and walks away with his head down as though I ruined his life. The lat time I saw him daily was in 1985. He still came up to me in 2019 as though we had lunch in late March of this year. He knows he isn't only wanting to have both of us for friends. My sister was never in touch with him and he never called her here. Was I right to move to the other side of Dad that day? I think yes. What do all of you think? Should one call someone a friend simply because they have mental or emotion issues?
|
|
|
|
Post by Al S on Aug 13, 2019 17:23:20 GMT -5
I try to be nice to everybody, everyday - my policy is I don’t want to make anyone have a bad day.
Unless they ask me a question they’ve already had answered 5+ times. Health issue or no, that’s instant shit-list.
|
|
|
|
Post by usawoman on Aug 13, 2019 22:55:02 GMT -5
Alan,
Thank you for answering my question. After reading and thinking I have decided that it isn't good for that one person and myself to be friends or even polite acquaintances.
Why aren't others answering as well?
|
|
|
|
Post by E on Aug 14, 2019 2:06:18 GMT -5
I agree with Alan. Do unto others etc etc... Try to walk a mile in their shoes - and so on. Admittedly, persistently being rude begins to wear and tear, at which point either politely ignore or add them to your shit list, depending what mood you're in.
|
|
|
|
Post by usawoman on Aug 14, 2019 16:08:48 GMT -5
Ed,
Thank you for replying. My inner feelings are to forgive. Yet not go anywhere near him. It is best that both he and I stay clear of each other.
|
|
Departed
Former Member
Posts: 0
Likes:
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 17, 2019 11:18:14 GMT -5
My policy has always been to give folks a chance, mental issues or not. But when someone is blatantly inconsiderate I have to draw the line, and depending on the situation I'll decide whether a telling off is in order or if it's better to distance myself from that person. Most often the latter is the best solution. It's not running away or hiding. I think the worst thing to do is to make nice and pretend to get along with someone just because other people think I should. That's just being fake. And it can open the door to being someone's doormat (Pun originally not intended, but I'll go with it!).
|
|
|
|
Post by jay on Aug 17, 2019 18:43:54 GMT -5
Hi all, It has been a long time since I posted here. I wonder if one should be nice to someone simply because they have mental or emotional issues? Is that just as awful as being mean to them due to that? Someone who I know has problems told people not to tell me for fear that I would tell my older sister, whom is is still obsessed with, after all of these many years. He thinks that since sis was nice to him back in the day I should be must be nice and his friend also. I can say that my sister wasn't into him or wanted to be his best friend. She was only 'polite' to him in public. Earlier this year this man comes up to me at Walmart and I move to the other side of Dad. Dave hangs his head and walks away with his head down as though I ruined his life. The lat time I saw him daily was in 1985. He still came up to me in 2019 as though we had lunch in late March of this year. He knows he isn't only wanting to have both of us for friends. My sister was never in touch with him and he never called her here. Was I right to move to the other side of Dad that day? I think yes. What do all of you think? Should one call someone a friend simply because they have mental or emotion issues? Is it wrong to "like" and be nice to somebody only because they have special needs? To a point, yes. But it is also wrong to completely ignore a person because of a mental or emotional disability. Even if it's only a simple "hello" to a person, that will suffice. But don't actively avoid somebody because of their issues. Unless you feel that this person could potentially be dangerous. |
|
|
|
Post by usawoman on Sept 8, 2019 8:30:08 GMT -5
Hi all,
Thank you to those who answered my question. I have decided it is best to stay clear of him. He need to confront his issues. Also, since he never called me up it is really something that he came up to me that day as though we have been in touch with each other all of these years. To ask someone to help him gets friends is really wacky. Since he is wanting people to be nice to him simply because he has issues he is going to meet up with heartache every now and then. To be insincere is horrid. To be polite is good. Yet if your hunch says stay away you should be by your hunch.
|
|
